i'm a red flag

according to a book i'm reading about international adopting (How to Adopt Internationally by Jean and Heino Erichsen) motives for adopting are very important to the success or failure of the adoption. makes sense. i'm not sure what a failed adoption is (you can't possibly give the kid back???) but my motive of wanting to help in the world is suspect. or the proper wording is "While [these response] may be given in all sincerity, their potential for failure is higher." the first example in this category is "we want to adopt a child orphaned in Afghanistan because of the war; in Hondurus because of the hurricane" etc etc. apparently a red flag flies up and the social worker begins to wonder if you have some kind of need to have someone be grateful to you. hmmm?? i suppose i can see how that could happen, but ummm i don't think i have that problem. its preferable, according to this book, to have motives along the lines of: "we don't want to get involved with local birth mothers." "we don't want to wait two to three years for a baby." "our family has all boys and no girls; all girls and no boys." weird.